Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Great Book And Parenting Challenges

Drew came home telling me about this book that he heard his teacher talking about. After bribbing convincing him to get his flu shot I bought him Wonder. I decided to read it to both of the boys as I was interested in the premise as well. Let me just say that this is a wonderful book for school aged to middle school children. There are so many life lessons to take from it and it shows compassion on many different levels. I'm really trying to enforce in my children that character counts in every situation. My kids are growing up and I'm not in the toddler trenches of spilled goldfish, and tantrums in the Target isle anymore but I'm nearing those teenage years. So when the mouthy and not so nice attitudes appear I'm some what ready on how to deal with the challenges. I can give them punishments as in taking away electronics but what I want most is a heart change. Just yesterday Drew and I had a heated argument about him not getting ready in time. It all started because Jaden hit him with a Nerf dart in this eye, and I didn't wake him up in time but he magically had time to have a mini Nerf gun fight and even catch some TV. So when it was time to go he hadn't ate breakfast yet. I was a bit annoyed with the excuses since most mornings I am doing the work of twenty. So with some blaming and some complaining in a disrespectful tone I asked him if he was talking to me because he was coming across very rude and he said, "Why Yes, I am" Part of me was laughing in my mom head thinking how funny it was because he was so MAD as he said with conviction why he wasn't ready and how it was all our fault. In a few seconds it escalated with more back talk and no apology. I was so sad that my precious son could act so disrespectful but what I needed most for him was to realize later that his anger was okay and they we all get frustrated but to know that the way he treated me hurt mom's heart. I hope that he got the lesson and he did apologize again this morning and he's going to have a long boring week without a computer and his precious Mind Craft. This being said I realize this will happen numerous times but if he gets why this it not okay and realizes how destructive words and tone are then I am doing my job.
Most of my parenting is disciplining my children. I wish I could say it was all fun, and laughing but it's not. I spend many moments a day correcting behaviors and working on attitude adjustments. My oldest son Jaden is having a hard time with math this year. He is still getting a "A" mind you but it's very difficult. Even his teacher said that it is hard and they are teaching at a 9th grade level. He wants it to be easy like it normally is for him but he is having to work hard and when he gets a "B" he is so upset.  School is not easy and all the kids are realizing this but it's an important lesson. If you don't study you don't do well and your going to have to work. It's not fun because I hate to see them struggle but I am trying to teach them life lessons. The boys especially are at critical influential ages. Almost daily I am hearing about many of their peers testing the waters at school and using unwise words without adults around. I understand my boys are not always going to be make the right choices but I'm very convinced right now it is crucial that I am here for them arms open and ready to listen. Saying all of this I am always looking on ways to open their eyes to new perspectives and feelings and there are so many great books and movies that can teach life lessons without a boring talk from mom. I hope they always want to talk with me but it's so cool to teach your children and then read a book or watch a good movie that follows good character. It usually opens the door up for discussions about many things. 
Saying all of this I am always looking on ways to guide their hearts and to show them the love of Christ. To stand up for the weak but also to know that sometimes bully kids or kids who need attention are sad and need love too. My mission in life is to lead my children to have purposeful lives that make our world at better more kind place and to know that God will use each one of them to be difference makers. I see uniqueness and greatness in each one of them but it has not been without correction and grace. When I ask them how they know that I love them they say because I discipline them and they know I do it because its helping them to become better people. I am very proud of my children they all have good hearts and care for others. This parenting things is defiantly not a race but a marathon but one with many rewards that have changed me to be a better person as well.

The best kids in the world!

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1 comment:

  1. You are a great mom precisely b/c this *IS* on your radar. I'm not looking forward to teenage attitudes, but we'll make it! :-D


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