Sunday, October 6, 2013

Marriage Wisdom

 You could learn a lifetime of wisdom from this movie, it's one of my very favorite movies. I think back when I married my husband, and how young we were. I was 18 when I met my husband, and we were married two years later. We defiantly did not always get along, we were like night and day. We were young and he was more mature, I will admit even though he has a few years on me. I ask him now what he saw in me, and he says.."I just knew you were special" Not that I was a totally different person but I was defiantly more self centered as most young adults are. I used to get mad about the dumbest things. He was so patient and kind like Noah. We were poor, and I don't know how we made it needless to say it was not very joyful. Some months we had more bills then what we had money. We ate lots of frozen pizza, he worked two jobs and went to college. I went to college and worked a job, but he was the one who always took care of me. We grew together and had many arguments. The funny thing is we loved each other deeply even though we argued we would always get over it. Life got better as we got more mature and actually had money to pay bills. We had our first son a few years after we got married and my love grew more for my husband. It's remarkable how ones love grows when you see each other as parents. When we got married I never though about the sickness and health for richer of poorer none of that. I don't think anyone goes into marriage thinking any of this, but I heard a pastor once say "Not IF these things happen but When....because we will all go through these times." Through all of our trials and mountain tops I am so thankful for my husband, my friend. We may not always handle our emotions the same and that is a good thing. It's funny how most people marry the opposite in personality. God knows what he is doing!! Rob and I always say that our personalities and hobbies compliment each other now, even though that was the thing that used to drive me nuts. Now I love that this man loves to measure five times and do projects perfectly and that he thinks things out before he reacts to any situation. Those are good traits that I love about him. Why do woman always want to change their man when they first get together? It's not going to happen but you may influence and soften their heart which to me is even better. We have been married for fourteen years now, I suppose I can give some advice now. My biggest lessons have been to forgive, to live in the moment and to laugh!!! We laugh so much, that is a big secret to happiness. If you have a man that tells you that you're beautiful and makes you laugh, you are blessed!! Have Grace on each other to know that we are all a little screwed up from our past and that person you marry is never going to fulfill you in every area of life. You will grow together and gain wisdom and love but you will also grow separately as a people. It's funny how little things seemed so big years ago and how looking back it was wasted time. When times are really hard you realize this, and none of us want the pain but it makes us reconsider our priorities.  With gained wisdom and journeying into my 30's marriage is still work but is actually it has gotten easier in some ways because I know who I am and I know what is most important.  It's not my husbands job to make me happy. I know most people think that but it's simply not true. If I live to make others happy, and do things in my everyday to bring myself joy then there is not a lot of time to  pick apart another person or complain what they aren't doing right. There is not a perfect person, or love story but only stories of sinners through this crazy life that learn to value and love the other person when it's not easy. It's amazing how God changes your heart in the process to fall more in love.
Time to watch the Notebook...Dear John anyone?...

1 comment:

  1. Love all of this Katie! You are so wise!! And yes all of this is true!! When my arm was in the splint last week and L was washing my hair. He said we vowed in sickness and in health. I love what you wrote About softing hearts. This is the perfect articulation of marriage!!

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